Understanding the concepts of “ought self” and “ideal self” is crucial in the field of psychology, as they play a significant role in shaping an individual’s behavior, emotions, and self-perception. The ought self refers to the person one believes they should be, based on societal norms, expectations, and personal values. Conversely, the ideal self is the person one aspires to become, embodying qualities and characteristics that are deeply meaningful and fulfilling. This article explores the differences between the ought self and the ideal self, their impact on mental health, and strategies to align these two selves for personal growth and well-being.
The ought self is often influenced by external factors, such as family, friends, and cultural expectations. This aspect of the self can lead to feelings of guilt, anxiety, and stress when one feels they are not living up to these expectations. For instance, someone may feel pressure to excel in their career, maintain a perfect home, and have a picture-perfect family life, all while adhering to societal norms. This constant struggle to meet these expectations can take a toll on one’s mental health and overall well-being.
On the other hand, the ideal self is driven by internal desires and values. It represents the person one truly wants to be, regardless of external pressures. The ideal self may include qualities such as kindness, intelligence, creativity, and resilience. When an individual aligns their actions and behaviors with their ideal self, they often experience greater satisfaction, happiness, and a sense of purpose in life.
The conflict between the ought self and the ideal self can lead to several psychological issues, such as low self-esteem, depression, and anxiety. When the gap between these two selves becomes too wide, individuals may feel like they are living a life that is unauthentic and unfulfilling. To bridge this gap, it is essential to identify the root causes of the conflict and develop strategies to align the ought self with the ideal self.
One approach to achieving this alignment is through self-reflection and self-compassion. By taking the time to understand one’s values, beliefs, and desires, individuals can better identify their ideal self. This process involves asking questions such as: What are my core values? What qualities do I admire in others? What kind of life do I want to live? Once these questions are answered, individuals can begin to make changes in their lives that reflect their ideal self.
Another strategy is to set realistic goals and expectations. It is important to recognize that the ought self may have unrealistic expectations that are difficult to meet. By setting achievable goals, individuals can gradually bridge the gap between their ought self and ideal self. Celebrating small victories along the way can also help maintain motivation and foster a sense of accomplishment.
In conclusion, the distinction between the ought self and the ideal self is a significant aspect of personal growth and mental health. By understanding the differences between these two concepts and working towards aligning them, individuals can lead more authentic, fulfilling lives. Through self-reflection, self-compassion, and realistic goal-setting, one can bridge the gap between the ought self and the ideal self, ultimately leading to improved well-being and happiness.
